Virginity

The first time I heard of this thing called "a blog" was during the 2004 elections. Peter Jennings suggested that we all text, e-mail or blog our opinions about the presidential race.

"We should what?!"

So being the nerd that I am, of course I tried to research it. Every time I Google'd the topic, I got a list of websites that featured everything from Kerokoppi the frog to obituaries to random folk with random thoughts about random topics. Essentially, I still didn't 'get it'. Now, I'm not technologically retarded or anything (maybe just a little slow), so I have the ability to grasp the concept of a blog. It was just that everybody knew what this enigma was but me. What rock had I been under? Either way I was embarrassed to ask anybody about blogging as I wasn't sure if it was a sport or fallen piece of tree bark in the swamp.

But since the turn of the year and the introduction of high-speed Internet access into my home, I have been trying to do a better job of joining the computer age like the rest of the folks my age. I am absorbed in it now. I belong to several list-serves. I send IM’s to mobile devices. I e-date. I chat like an old pro.

Chat is fun. I like it because it allows me to multi-task. I can eat a sandwich, watch TV, and paint my toes, while still being deeply engrossed in conversation. What I find interesting about it is the amount of effort that goes into it. I feel like I have to try way too hard to convey my personality. I have a sarcastic, sometimes dry, always quick wit. I’m usually pretty quiet, but I throw in some comical jabs here and there. Chatting, I have to always be ON. It feels like an audition or a performance. I feel as if I need to have a video of me doing some huck-a-buck song and dance in a bowtie and tap shoes in order to entertain. …LOL, LMAO, ROTFLMAO…Is it really that funny?

No…wait, let me answer that…uh…no.

I was even told that I seem too serious. What? Because I didn’t tell you I was laughing at my own jokes, you couldn’t tell I was kidding? Anyway. This coming from a grown-man whose love is manga and Yu-gi-oh. I’m not too serious…I just no longer get my toys from the bottom a cereal box.

But I digress (<---- I love Tavis Smiley!) But yes, the concept of a blog has opened my eyes to a whole ‘nother world. There are blogger conventions, so it seems (kinda looked like a bar-hopping fest from the photos…I was expecting Freaknik). There are people who post everyday, who have fans and groupies, who have folks hang on their every word, no matter how foolish. And while it may sound like I’m doggin’ the whole concept, the contrary is true. The fact is, I want in. Yes, I want my followers to wait with baited-breath until my next sprinkle of wisdom rains down upon them. I want people to wish me well if I post that I have a dental appointment. I want my own connection into the club where people give you tips on where to eat, shop and club when you visit new cities. Essentially, when it all boils down to it, I want to be like Brutha Code. If you haven’t been there, please visit his site. (http://www.bruthacode.blogspot.com/). This man is a living, breathing ball of silliness. He has had posts that have brought me to tears, gut-wrenching pain, and an occasional guffaw because he is so blunt, honest and crazy. But the people, they love him. And I must admit, I, too, am a BC groupie.

But I feel like I deserve groupies too. Granted, I have no earthly desire to post everyday like him, but I still want the fans and the paparazzi. I have a lot to say. NO, REALLY, I DO! I can be just as crazy as he (okay…maybe not AS crazy…but in a close second). I am a writer and retired actor and I see this as a bit like theatre…like Hollywood. You go on, perform, and leave people with something to talk about. Bloggers are the thespians of the Internet. I can write, tell a few jokes and laugh at them…LMAO! I can do this. (If for nothing more than the therapeutic qualities of the art and act of writing).

So BC, if you’re reading this, thanks again for popping my blog cherry. I hope I make you proud. And next time you come to Atlanta, maybe I’ll get an invitation to the drinking fest that is the Blogger’s Convention